It's Electric!

Are you one of those incredibly wise persons who whole-heartedly acknowledges that running is some exquisite form of torture? If the answer to this question is "yes", then you might be shocked to learn that I USED to be one of you--but have now joined the ranks of the Enlightened Few who have discovered how to make running fun, and as painless as possible.
My divine epiphany arrived the night of August 30th, in Downtown Denver at the Electric Run. The Electric Run is a 5K that starts at 8:30 PM, and uses 1 million Watts of sound and light energy to create an incredible 5K experience. Rockstar Energy helps sponsor the charity event, and there are tons of free energy drinks and neon cups offered to runners/walkers/joggers. The Electric Run temporarily transforms cities into run-through-able nightclubs for participants. We ran along parking lots and sidewalks downtown, and into stadiums, tunnels, and warehouses, each of which had a different musical theme booming and a unique light show experience. For example, one tunnel was lit with blue/purple lights and filled with bubble machines! Another unique lighting display was a piece of "light art" featuring umbrellas and neon lights! 
Participants dress in glow sticks--and, in our case, self-decorated tanks that we attacked with glow-in-the-dark paint--and occasionally tutus and LED-customized shirts for the run. Although I know very little about the politics and ins and outs of 5K's or any other sorts of runs, it does seem that the Electric Run is a very supportive run, complete with volunteers cheering you on at every corner, and energetic music blasting and bright lights flashing around every turn :) In other words, the Electric Run is a running dance party!
At the very end of the run, in a huge stadium, is a dance party for a few hours, complete with more DJ-ing, dancing, glow stick throwing, and merchandise-handing-out. 

In short, I definitely recommend this run to anyone who likes running, kind of likes running, kind of doesn't like running, and feels slightly apprehensive about the activity. You will all very much enjoy it! Also, in case you're not a sprinter by nature, it's so accessible to walkers that several people even pushed babies in strollers through the race! 

So next year, ladies and gentlemen. Don't forget to sign up!!

Holding Your Liquor: A Blog Post in Honor of Going to College

For the young pre-collegiate and freshmen population out there, this sweet warning tale is for you.

Every day at my middle school, I would stop by one of the administrators' offices during lunch to pet his dog, Hans. Hans was the most adorable of little dogs, considering that, as an aging wiener dog, his little legs barely lifted his tummy above the ground and the mole that grew above his eyebrow looked remarkably like a black jelly bean, and, of course, he was incredibly affectionate.

One day, the dog's owner told me about how very entertaining Hans had been a few weeks before. It was the holiday season, and Hans' owner, whom I knew, and his partner, had left home for an evening to go to a party with friends. That day, they'd been given a package of chocolates that were infused with various liquors, and each chocolate had a different-colored wrapper depending on if it contained rum, whiskey, vodka, scotch, etc. Unlike most liquor-infused chocolates, however, these ones had an exceptionally high liquor content (and, I assume, the blue, green, red, etc wrappers were most certainly exceptionally pretty). 

The administrator and his partner returned home from a holiday party late that night, only to find a lovely array of blue, red, green, gold, and purple wrappers all over the floor of their living room. They exchanged a humorous and slightly doomed glance; Hans had discovered--and opened--the chocolates! Then, a few feet away tottered the culprit himself, gazing blankly around the two men in amused, disoriented circles, and spinning and walking in little circles all over the room. Hans paused for a moment and took in the dizzying sight of his owners. Then he made one more happy circle, looked at the ceiling, snorted, and plopped onto the ground. The dog happily wagged his tail at his owners and passed out. 

Apparently, 10-pound Hans didn't hold his liquor--or his chocolate--very well!

Unless you are a wiener dog or have something you would like to tell all of us, don't do this. Don't be a Hans. You can't pull off the passing out quite as well..

How to be as Distracted as Possible: A Manual

As fall comes around again and everyone's various school years, work calendars, and project schedules begin to kick into gear, one might notice skyrocketing stress levels and plummeting productivity capacities (because, let's face it, being able to beat four levels of your favorite video game in one hour isn't actually real-world productivity). These two issues are symptoms of one master illness--the catastrophically contagious, horridly hard-to-beat Distractedness Influenza. Yes, ladies and gentlemen; we are succumbing to that catching common cold-turned-virus, and this post is to help you learn how to stave it off and become less distracted than ever--without losing your creativity in the process. 

First, we must acknowledge that in order to overcome the enemy, we must first understand what the enemy is like--how it sneaks up on us, how we are vulnerable to it, and where its weaknesses lie. After all, you know what they say; if you can't beat them, join them. Thus, here is your very own manual entitled How to be as Distracted as Possible. If you follow all the advice in this post, you should turn into as distracted a person as possible within a few hours. For an insider's view into the mind of a distracted person, read on...

How to be as Distracted as Possible

Don't Ever Keep a List

If you do not keep a list, you will be able to ensure that any thought that pops into your head deserves your attention immediately, effectively stealing your mind from whatever it is doing and making you think about what you ought, or ought not, to be doing instead. No lists now means no organized plan later, guaranteeing you a disoriented period of time in which to become distracted after the completion of each and every task in your day. This pause of wasted time gives you ample opportunity for distraction after your completed activity--which, of course, was completed in a very distracted state of mind because your thoughts were jumping from item to item that it ought to remember. Furthermore, if you do not keep a list (or, heaven forbid, several..), you will most likely be able to distract yourself from one task by dropping it and jumping into another task the instant you remember to do it. For example, if you faithfully restrain from keeping any sort of list, you will begin to notice a buildup of half-finished chores, tasks, and projects. With pride, you will note a growing  accumulation of half-scrubbed dishes, partially packed suitcases, unfinished packets, and widowed shoes and socks who have found themselves suddenly missing their other halves. 

Make Sure That You Leave Things Unfinished. Alway--

Ladies and gentlemen, I cannot stress the importance of this suggestion strongly enough. So I will do my very best to boil it down for you. If you finish things, how on earth do you expect them to come haunt you from the Completed Items grave and distract you from things that you actually need to be doing?? Please don't fall into this trap. Don't ever finish anything. That way, you give every nagging to-do on your list the ability to provide you with unlimited, infinite, endless…(I shall leave this list of adjectives unfinished, for I most certainly practice what I preach) distraction! And just in case you think that you might have some difficulty finding things to not finish, here are some suggestions--just the bare bones--that you really ought to make sure you never ever finish. To join the ranks of highly distracted people out in the world, pick up these non-closure-encouraging habits. 

1). Never end or temporarily stop texting, Facebooking, gChating, IMing, Skyping, or any other kind of messaging while you are trying to get something done, much less close these windows on your computer/ phone! That way, you can enable every trivial comment, update, and status change to fully distract you from your work.

2). If you have started a task, don't see it through to the end. Be sure to always stop halfway, partway, or most of the way through. For example, if you are putting away laundry, only put away one color of shorts at a time, and be sure to take several-day-long breaks in between organizing each pile.

3). If you are close to finishing a task or achieving a goal, do whatever possible to prevent yourself from actually achieving it. You can easily practice perfecting this art by never finishing a book. Leave three pages at the end of every book that you read, making sure to keep all books out (and NEVER put away) until you finish them (which you won't). This way, not only will you sporadically wonder what actually happens at the end of all those books, but you will spot them lying on the floor/desk/chair/bed/table and immediately become distracted by your unfinished business. Magic!

Be Certain to Always be Waiting on Someone Else

If you are reliant upon someone else to think of you and work you into his or her schedule, you are sure to be constantly distracted! Not only will he or she keep you constantly guessing as to when you will receive some sort of notification or important, pressing information, but his or her potential tardiness in giving you this sort of attention will provide a perfect, torturous distraction. After all, if you are capable of controlling your own schedule and never have to wait on anyone else, how are you supposed to get all delayed and distracted? So there you go! Always be sure that the things you need must come from other people. Never be self-sufficient or capable of getting things for yourself. And if you think that it might be possible to procure your own resources, find a different method of attaining those resources that involves at least one (hopefully unreliable) other person. That way, your days and weeks and months will be chalk full of waiting, wondering, and happy futility :) . Remember that you can wait on someone else for all sorts of things--attention, a message, emotional support, or even critical information. Most importantly, however, know that you can also wait on other people to make your decisions for you, effectively securing a huge holdup in your schedule whenever crucial decisions must be made, and also putting you at the mercy of someone else's decision-making skills, despite the fact that this person might not know you quite as well as he or she thinks he or she does. This way, you can allow others to distract you as you wait for services, items, and decisions!

Never Ever Let Yourself Have Confidence in What You're Doing

Self doubt and a lack of self confidence are absolutely key for this final step. If you believe in what you're doing, it will be far too easy for you to focus and key in on what's important to you. Therefore, constantly remind yourself that this personal sense of conviction in your beliefs and values is entirely worthless and irrelevant if you desire success or happiness. Allow others to sway you from your opinions with snide comments, ridiculous insults, and irrelevant, inaccurate statements. That way, you will be easily distractible whenever you begin doing something that actually matters to you! Don't forget that you are always wrong. Thus, allow others to distract you from your original path without much resistance from you--and you'll be the single most distractible, sway-able person on the globe!

So there it is, ladies and gentlemen. I hope that you take this pieces of advice to heart to become the wonderfully distracted individuals that I know you all have the innate potential to become! Or, if this lifestyle seems slightly repulsive, or at least constrictive to you, I recommend altering (or maybe even reversing) some aspects of this free distraction consultation. But only if you need an extra little distraction from your busy schedules!

First World Problems: I

Dear Reader,

Do you ever feel that you are plagued by what is simply the most terrible and distressing of all problems? For example, are you ever bombarded with too many Facebook messages to respond to all at once, or do you return from the grocery store only to realize that you have purchased 1% milk instead of the skim milk with added Vitamin D that you'd counted on for your daily chocolate milk?
If you ever feel this way, reader, then you have come to the right place to talk about any and all sorts of these terribly catastrophic and earth shattering FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS.

This series of blog posts will be intermittent and last for quite a while, as I can imagine that you, me, and everybody's dog most certainly has had his or her fair share of such traumatic-yet-fabulously-not-that-important challenges.

Example One: The Job Search
My friend is currently a rising junior at a prestigious business program at a very well-known university. Upon securing a highly coveted summer internship for his sophomore summer, he easily completed the internship, finding himself surprisingly unchallenged by the "challenging" itineraries created by the company. This company is one of the top three companies in its field and is internationally respected and hired by other companies. My friend, however, is slightly panicked. He has been given a job offer by this company, you see (Repeat: he has been offered a job by a company that business school grads would die to secure). But this news is more disturbing and worrisome than joyous, because my friend isn't sure if he wants to spend the rest of his life working at this company.

First World Problem in a Nutshell: my friend unintentionally over-performed at his crazy-hard-to-get summer internship, so he is now being molested by a company that is trying oh-so-hard to hire him as soon as legally possible. Poor baby. On the bright side, my friend has managed to achieve the collegiate dream of ensuring employment prospects after college!

Makeup in Mini-Minutes

Do you ever rush out the door to a busy day, only to realize that you've done something horribly embarrassing that only overly rushed people do? Such as, for example, forgetting to put blush on your other cheek, or forgetting to blend that uber-heavy eye shadow so that you look more low-key hipster and less jet lagged call girl? 

Not to worry! Jordan is here with the panacea to your problems. Here are the complete details for a flawless makeup in mini-minutes beauty routine that won't only get you looking gooooood for your day/night, but will get you looking greater than great in five minutes or fewer. 

Step One: The Face

I don't care how tan you are, or how infrequently you treat yourself to that derma-delicious crema called sunscreen. You still ought to put it on as part of your daily routine. I, however, have developed a trick that combines sunscreen and brightening cream into one step.

 Put a dime-sized amount of a thin sunscreen of high SPF (30 SPF at least, 50 SPF if you can, and higher if possible) on the top of your hand, and then squeeze out a pea-sized amount of an illuminating cream onto the same hand. I recommend a slightly runny SPF, such as Chanel's UV Essentiel, and an illuminating moisturizer, such as fresh's Twilight Freshface Glow for this heavenly combination. With your finger, mix the pearly cream into the thin sunscreen and apply generously to your entire face. Once you subtly glimmer with a healthy, fresh, and lively glow, you'll know that you've applied your sunscreen to your whole face. 

You might soon ask yourself--how did I never know that applying sunscreen feels this good--and this beautifying?? Don't forget to apply some of this mixture to the area just under your brows. 

This step should take approximately 60 to 45 seconds to complete. 

Step Two: The Lash Line

To keep the look awake, flattering, and as close to au naturel as possible, use a pen eyeliner, such as Smashbox's Limitless Liquid Liner Pen, to darken your lashline. If you wing your lashes, only wing them slightly--and there is no need to end the line all the way in the inner, kitten corners of your eyes. Don't worry if you smudge it a wee bit.

This step should take 60 seconds.

Step Two: The Color

Mint Snow,
in the stick

This is the fun part--the color, the fun, and the sparkles! I recommend using two different Laura Mercier Caviar Stick Eye Colour creamy shadows. I personally use the liners in Mint Snow (a pale, silvery blue) and Sapphire (a rich, shimmery, strong blue that can easily go very dark). Although the caviar eye sticks are called eye liners, they are not traditional eyeliners; they are in stick form, and cover more area than the strict lash line, when used. Since they are cream shadows, you have 30 seconds to blend and adjust the liner before it settles for long-lasting wear (a true godsend!).

Sapphire, in the center

 Choose the paler of your two compatible shades (Mint Snow) and swipe it along your lash line, from the inner corner of your eye until just after your base eyeliner line ends. When in doubt, add more. The color is light enough that your line can err on the side of being too large or too long, and nobody will ever notice. Immediately after, run the darker caviar shade from the middle of your lashline to the end. With your finger, blend any access dark color down into your lashes or toward the outer edge of your eye (this is when you'll appreciate the blendability of these Laura products). 

This step should take between 60 and 90 seconds. 

Step Three: The Lashes

To finish off your devilishly catching eyes, opt for a mascara that won't go nuts on volume, clumping, or obscene length. You simply want to give those lashes a little something extra--a bit of volume, a bit of length, and a bit of definition--to complete the look. 

This step should take approximately 45 seconds. 

Step Four: The Lips

Go for any lipstick that you love, as long as it's not too intense! If you're feeling creative, apply a quick layer of a shade just darker/pinker than your lips, and then apply another light layer right above it in a lipstick with a more orangey tone to the center of your lips. Press lips together, and voila!

This step should take 30 seconds. 

So, to add up the time needed for this wonderful Makeup in Mini-Minutes strategy...

Step One: 60 seconds    +

Step Two: 60 seconds   +

Step Three: 45 seconds +

Step Four: 30 seconds   =

Grand Total: 195 seconds (3 minutes and 15 seconds)

Enough said. Happy primping!

Yo Soy Feliz

Yo Soy Feliz is a fabulous accessories and clothing store from Italy. Sporting stores in Positano and Naples-- or Napoli, as it's named in Italian-- Yo Soy Feliz lives up to the high fashion expectations associated with Italy, Europe, and high profile destinations such as Positano. 

This store offers everything from colorful clutches, statement and fun bracelets, bold rings, and jewelry to posh scarves, multicolored clothing, and adorable wallets. Basically, it's a girl's best friend because these pieces have the unique, admirable, and universally coveted ability to complete, upgrade, and enliven anything. And by anything I mean anything ever. 

Yo Soy Feliz shopfront in Positano

If your wardrobe chronically suffers from Permanent Winter Syndrome--ie you wear sweaters with no color and pants with no color and old boots with, yes, no color (and yes, I know it, you wear these monotonous or colorless pieces under dull and dreary colorless outerwear)--Yo Soy Feliz will provide the fashionista panacea that your clothing has been begging you for for, probably, ever. If you are like me and always ensure that, if nothing else, your outfit is at least colorful (and hopefully cute and desirably happy-making), Yo Soy Feliz will dazzle you with its matte-yet-colorful options. And if you call yourself professional, serious, and mature and need an extra little something--maybe an extra little push, or mouthwateringly tempting incentive--to break out of your White House Black Market/ J Crew/ Nordstrom's comfort zone, Yo Soy Feliz can provide you with one of the world's largest collections of upbeat, perky, and colorful accessories. While statement pieces cover the shop's shelves and tables, a plethora of slightly more reserved pieces also abound in the store.

Finally, Yo Soy Feliz will definitely make you feliz before, during, and after shopping. The "before" is because the anticipation of entering the store will simply brighten your day. The "during" is because you know that you are buying wonderful things that you will use and wear for a wonderfully long, wonderfully fashionable time. The "after" is because you will always remember that you bought such wonderful things for a wonderful low price (the fashion power rings I was raving about were 3 euros each!).

One word--COLORS, ladies and gentlemen,

In case you weren't sure, "yo soy feliz" means "I am happy" in Spanish. Spanish, however, has two different verbs that both mean "to be". One such verb has a more temporary and transient meaning that is used to express emotions, readiness, and one's current location--things that are fleeting and often do not have a long duration (ex: I am excited. She is here.).  The other "to be" verb is a more permanent verb that is used to portray descriptors, such as personality attributes, occupations, and physical appearances (ex: We are tall. I am a blogger.). Therefore, if one were to follow this pattern, one would use the more transient verb to say "I am happy"because an emotion is impermanent. The phrase "yo soy feliz", however, uses the other, more permanent verb in its title. I like to think that Yo Soy Feliz knows that its customers will simply become happier people upon shopping there; and that is the extent to which you will adore this shop. 

Be sure to check out Yo Soy Feliz on Facebook by Facebook searching "Yo Soy Feliz--Abbigliamento di tendenza".  Enjoy!

Smoothie Time!

Now that it's officially into legitimate summertime territory, it's important for you to be up-to-date on all the best, brightest, and, of course, yummiest smoothie strategies for the season.

If you want to go classic...
For a delicious classic smoothie, there are three rules: keep it simple, keep it cold, and keep it fresh. For that delicious trademark "smoothie" taste, toss plain yogurt, orange juice, a banana, and a concoction of fresh berries (strawberries for sure, blueberries for probably, blackberries maybe, and raspberries if you're feeling adventurous) into the blender for a fail-proof smoothie success.
For a smooth twist on this classic beverage, add some fresh peaches to the mix.

If you want to pretend you're at a spa and taking the exotic route...
Who says that you have to go to a spa to feel like you're at one? Only the people in the marketing department for spas and luxury hotels. For everyone else out there, here are a few tricks to make smoothies that taste just as healthy, luxurious, pure, and delicious as gourmet spa-style smoothies. We commonly consider "spa food" to be a balanced, healthful mix of yummy and vitamin-y foods. However, in the smoothie realm, you don't have to sacrifice any taste bud approval to get that vibrant, rejuvenating, spa-like taste. In my house, we've applied this approach to breakfasttime by making smoothies with frozen cherries or cantaloupe and other melons. Frozen Bing cherries are naturally less sweet than fresh berries, but they still retain enough innate sweetness to make a delicious, vitamin-packed smoothie. For a lighter blend, opt for cantaloupe, cantaloupe and mint, or cantaloupe and strawberries to flavor your new beverage.

If you want to go tropical...
I strongly believe in the strength of willpower and mental concentration. Therefore, whenever I want something badly enough, I simply have to think about it--and think about it really hard--until I feel closer to obtaining it. This often happens with me and tropical beaches. You see, one of my first and greatest loves is the ocean and the shoreline, but living in a landlocked state tends to make it difficult to access the waters that I love so much. Thus, I've discovered several methods for pretending to be on or near the beach. And one of the most successful of these methods is entitled How to Feel Like You Are at the Beach--Through a Smoothie. Recently, I had the most delicious tropical smoothie ever. Try to think of it this way: it was a Piña Colada without the sugar overload; it was a fruity umbrella drink without the umbrella or concentrated fruit juice; it was a beach without sand, sunburn, or damp beach towels; it was a beach vacation, in a cup, without airfare, hotel prices, packing lists, or rental cars. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, this tropical smoothie was a sort of heaven in a cup (and please prepare yourself, if you ever try this smoothie; I do not use the phrase "heaven in a cup" lightly; I've only ever used it to describe hot chocolate, which is easily one of the greatest foods in the entire world.). To create your own version of this delectable drink, use the classic yogurt, OJ, and banana combination as a foundation for your masterpiece. Then, add chunks of fresh watermelon slices, a few small pieces of pineapple, and some strawberries to the mix. After this, add a bit more watermelon for good measure. If you're one of those people who is a suckler for mangoes, papayas, or lychees, put some of those in as well. And when it's finished... voila! Enjoy your beach-without-a-beach!

If you pay attention to details...
Everyone knows that the best parts are always in the fine details. Therefore, be sure not to skip over these tips that can perfect your already near-perfect smoothie-slurping experience.
The glass: presentation and packaging matters--even when we say that it doesn't. Therefore, don't deprive your smoothie of the fashionable exterior that it deserves! Either opt for your favorite glassware, or go for something different--such as a wine glass, brandy glass, or margarita glass (champagne glasses don't work as well because they are too slender for hardcore smoothies). It is common knowledge that everything tastes better in a wine glass.
The accessories: smoothies don't always have to be enjoyed alone. By adding mixtures of granola, nuts, dried fruits, or whatever other treats that you'd like to your creation, you can make your smoothie appropriate to consume at any point in the day. Also, keep in mind that yogurt parfaits are nothing compared to smoothie ones :) .
The cleanup: just as a side note, remember this one gem of smoothie knowledge: if you forget to clean the blender or cup that your smoothie was in, the smoothie remains will become synonymous with glue. I promise. Therefore, always fill your various glassware and kitchen utensils with water immediately after enjoying your smoothie.

So now--enjoy!